I have been thinking about this for a long time now. No doubt that having a full-time job has had some influence on how I feel about this. When I was growing up, music was my everything. I still love it with all of my heart, but no longer in the same way. For a time I even claimed that music saved my life, something Alternative Press is putting in an upcoming magazine.
But I have to be honest, music just isn’t in my interests anymore. I used to freelance for Substream Music Press, after I went to school for journalism. I really thought I was going to be a music journalist. This was before I realized that journalism, not just music journalism, doesn’t pay anything. You have to do many years of unpaid freelancing and work, and honestly I wasn’t passionate enough about journalism to do that. I wanted other goals in life to take precedent. I also really thought was going to work on Warped Tour, it’s really still a dream to me, but without working in the music industry first it isn’t looking too good for me.
I started out loving music like Linkin Park and Korn. I went through an undeniable emo stage, something I never would have admitted as a teen. That turned into a love for metal and metalcore music. If you haven’t experienced that world, it’s hard to explain. Going to shows was my life. My first was My Chemical Romance. I loved them. I was at a show every month for years. The highlight of my year is always Warped Tour. I still can’t wait to go this summer, but other than that I have had no interest in going to any concerts. The last I went to was A Day To Remember in October, and that’s because I was doing promotions.
I used to be on top of all of the new music in the industry. The last album I was actually interested in was The Devil Wears Prada’s 8:18 and the only reason for that was, they are my favorite band. I didn’t even like August Burns Red latest album and they’re up there for favorite bands. How sad. One album that I think I need to hear is You Me At Six’s latest album, but I’ve been meaning to do that for over two weeks now.
So what happened. Life. I grew up and music didn’t grow with me. I got a full-time job that takes up most of my time now. After I had that job for a few months I decided that having my own apartment was most important to me; it became for my main goal. I achieved it. Then traveling came up and now it’s one of the only things I think about. I can’t wait to save enough money to travel to any place that I want. I’m too young to be tied down here, I don’t even love it here. How do you love -10 degrees? You don’t, you just grit your teeth through it. My new hobby has really taken over my free time, and that’s the gym. I spend five days a week there and when I’m not at the gym I like to spend my money on healthy food and trying to convince others to go to the gym too. It’s really changed my life.
I’m sure some people are going to read this and be able to completely relate to this. Not everyone’s dreams come true, and I’ve realized and accepted that. Others will read this and have no idea how I can feel this way. Some may even think it’s a bit of betrayal. The honest truth is, that life doesn’t turn out as you may have planned it. I’m living my life now, in the moment, and this is where I am right now.